Saturday, November 24, 2007

Committing to memory

A random person told me recently that "life is not all about work. That if it was, then there would be no need for the living, that we might as well all be robots."

As I sit and write this, it may be a coincidence that I have Rod Stewart singing "For the first time" on my stereo with their added on speakers. This was the song that the children's father used to sing for me. And for once.. I am able to smile at that memory, without any of the anger or vindictiveness that lingered.

I have to commit this moment to memory. This very sober moment. Yups - no alcohol at all, even though the glass has been poured out since 3 pm.

Life is not like work.. a schedule of deadlines and goals to meet. It's what we create on a day to day basis that makes it LIFE. And there's no recipe for it. No manuals. No courses or degrees to take.

I have to stop making it to be like work. There is no checksheet, nor Standard Operating Procedures that I have to follow.

I had wanted to close this with the line "I can do this. I seriously CAN do this!" but that would be saying that I am living with a set of rules and a timeline.

So instead.. I'll close with the thought that... over time.. I will be able to live life not as a procedure, but as life is.


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