I wrote a lot of things tonight. And I've gone and erased them all because at the end of a day, like today, they are nothing but words without any real meaning.
So this is was they mean when they say that you're "spent". In all my life, in the faces of all the adversities, I have never had this sense of being in a space where there is a keen sense of empty, all turned out.
A friend of mine once commented to me, that he's never known anyone whom he's liked so much that he couldn't bear to have even just a little of that person over nothing at all. Well Danny-boy.. you're one of the lucky ones then, I guess. To never know what that feels like.
Cos right here... right now... it feels like hell. And I don't know which is worse. To live my life as lucky as Danny-boy, or the way it is now.
I've drunk way too much. I've smoked way too much. And yet, I cannot conjure up any form of emotions at all. And now was I sit here, as I have been since I got home at midnight from a drive to no where, there's nothing worthy that's left to say.
For once, I am in real possession of emptiness. And I cannot find any meaning to it. Any real meaning to it.
They say... you can't really miss something until it's gone from you. How did I get here...?
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