But.. but.. but..

stu.pe.fy ~ verb

1. To put into a state of little or no sensibility; benumb the faculties of; put into a stupor.
2. To stun, as with a narcotic, a shock or a strong emotion.
3. To overwhelm with amazement; astound; astonish.

And that is what I'm feeling right now...

This is the last time that I will say these words
I remember the first time - the first of many lies
Sweep it into the corner, or hide it under the bed
Say these things they go away - but they never do

In spite of myself, I laid down my wager and placed the bet nonetheless. I did not reckon I would bet on the wrong horse though. That the invitation would be taken up.

This is the last time that I will show my face
One last tender lie and then I'm out of this place
So tread it into the carpet or hide it under the stairs
Say that some things never die - well I tried

I should have listened to the wise of words Chris Rock, who according to Puppy, said this:

All men want are 3 things - food, sex and quiet ~
Feed me, fuck me and shut the fuck up!

And it is the last line that lingers on my mind. I should have bloody shut the fuck up, instead of being all gung-ho, no holds barred!

Something I wasn't sure of but I was in the middle of
Something I forget now but I've seen too little of

It is sometimes, a bane, to be eloquent... to be able to put your innermost thoughts down in a manner that, though is not intended to cause grief.. does in the end anyways.

And no - I do not think that "we" are gonna bounce back from Chemical Shooter, any stronger.

No... I seriously doubt there would be any bouncing at all from now on.

I wish I could say I am a person of more faith. Especially faith in being acceptable, despite everything else that is not right about me, and with me. But alas, no. Among all my possible "virtues", faith is not one of them.

I'm gonna go crawl under the table now. And I don't think I'm the only who's feeling like sitting under the table right now.

I'll say it again - I am stupefied!